White Horse
by CheeryBroody83
Summary: She's been hurt too many times and now there's a brick wall around her heart that no one seems able to knock down. He isn't perfect... he isn't ideal, but maybe that's exactly what she needs. Post 6x12 - B/Ju
1. You Can't Break a Broken Heart

**Summary:**_ She's been hurt too many times and now there's a brick wall around her heart that no one seems able to knock down. He isn't perfect... he isn't ideal, but maybe that's exactly what she needs. _

**Pairing: **_Brooke/Julian with mention of BL, LP and PJu._

**Disclaimer: **_I don't own anything that you recognize. The title comes from a new Taylor Swift song entitled: White Horse  
_

**Author's Note**_: This story picks up from 6x12 with a few changes. One.. Peyton is neither pregnant nor sick. Two.. I hate both Owen and Chase so neither of them will be making an appearance in this story. And since I don't really know much about what's going to happen in later episodes regarding all the couples, this will follow my own idea, rather than any spoilers that may be out there._

_**You Can't Break a Broken Heart - Kate Voegele (Mia)**_

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**Chapter One - You Can't Break a Broken Heart  
**

_So try you best now baby  
Try your best to break me  
You can't break a broken heart  
No damage you can do now  
I'm immune to you now  
You can't break what broke apart _

The house felt so empty and alone without Sam around blaring her music or complaining about something. Brooke could almost laugh as she realized that the complaints which had initially bugged her, were now something that she genuinely missed.

It had been two days since Sam disappeared and Brooke was starting to wonder if she'd ever come back.

"Still no luck?" Haley guessed when she showed up at Brooke's with two cups of coffee and a bag of bagels.

"No, nothing."

"She'll turn up," Haley tried to reassure, though the words didn't seem to have their desired effect. Instead, Brooke just continued to stare at the coffee cup Haley handed her. Almost as if she was looking for the answer to some unknown question in the murky brown liquid. "Have you gotten any sleep recently?" she asked suddenly.

Brooke replied without looking up, "Some."

Sighing, Haley set her own cup down and walked around the counter to Brooke's side. "If she came back, do you really think that the two of you could overcome what happened?" she gently asked.

"Of course," Brooke said instantly as she finally looked up. "What happened wasn't Sam's fault. Okay, she didn't ask for it to happen, she was just angry and she's never had someone who... it's _not_ her fault," she declared strongly, while Haley released a small sigh of relief.

"I know it's not," the smaller brunette agreed. "I just wanted to know where your head was," Haley admitted and placed a reassuring hand on Brooke's. "She grew on all of us, you know. We'll all keep looking for her and sooner or later, one of us is bound to hear something."

Brooke smiled thinly and pushed back the image of Julian throwing his coffee cup into a garbage can as he walked away.

"I know you all are. Thanks."

---

"So what'd you think of Dixon?" Julian asked as he shuffled some papers around. He'd seemed distracted since they first sat down and Lucas also hadn't missed the way his eyes darted towards the diner doors every couple of minutes. "You gonna sign off on him?"

"I'm not sure." The name sparked his most recent memory of his trip to Los Angeles. Specifically the series of off the wall meetings with an over the top director. "He was interesting," Lucas hedged. "But I'm not sure about all these changes he wants to make to the script," he admitted, excluding the reservations he had about Dixon's cocaine habit.

"The guy loves his drama, but he's usually pretty respectful of a writer's vision," Julian spoke absentmindedly while jotting something down in his notebook.

"Yeah, he said as much when we talked."

"Hmm," Julian replied noncommittally.

The indifference was the last in a series of reasons why Lucas couldn't stand the guy he sat across from. "Listen, is there something else you'd rather be doing right now? Because I was under the assumption that you wanted to make a movie," the brooding blonde stated, finally garnering Julian's full attention.

"The story may revolve around you, Lucas but the world doesn't," Julian replied before shuffling his papers back into a neat stack. "There are other details that need to be taken care of, so that's what I'm doing. Because yes... I do want to make this movie."

"You know, you really are a dick."

"So I've been told," Julian answered, nonplussed. Reaching for his bag, he buried the papers inside and spared Lucas one final glance. "By the way, tell Peyton I said hi."

---

As the hours ticked by, Brooke began to go stir crazy. She hated waiting around for the city cops to come up with some kind of answer as to where Sam had gone. Hated wondering whether she ran away of her own free will, or if the guy who had attacked her had gone after Sam for coming forward with the truth.

And Brooke Davis hated feeling helpless again.

She knew that if she continued to sit around, that she'd probably go crazy with even more worry. So she reached for her purse and locked the door behind her.

_You can't break a broken heart. No damage you can do now. I'm immune to you now._

The streets were lonely as she drove alone and listened to Mia's voice on the radio. The song reminded her of the USO concert and the way Sam had laughed and enjoyed herself backstage. It also reminded her of Julian, though Brooke would never have admitted that out loud.

It had been playing in the background as she warned him away from Peyton and Lucas. Still playing when her best friend had walked up and tipped her hand as she showed the slightest bit of jealousy that her ex-boyfriend had been flirting with someone else. And now it played as she found herself driving towards the little Inn on the edge of town.

She needed to argue.. needed to fight... and she knew exactly who her punching bag would be.

_There's nothing you can do to me no more. You can't break a broken heart._

Julian ran a tired hand through his hair as the pages on his laptop screen began to blur together.

For over three hours he had sifted through permit request forms, resumes, inquiries and carried on a back and forth conversation with Dixon's assistant. A woman who had long since given up trying to decipher the inner-workings of her boss.

And it was why he dreaded the sound of someone knocking on his door.

There was only one person who would show up at his hotel room unannounced and Julian really didn't feel like dealing with Lucas again.

Not when all their conversations and arguments about the movie were really just masked barbs because of his past with Peyton. Not that Julian didn't enjoy rubbing it in Lucas' nose every chance he got. He figured it was the least he could do after getting punched in the face for something Peyton had or hadn't said.

"I heard you the first time," he tiredly called out as the knocking persisted. Pushing the laptop away, he got up from his chair went to halt the obviously agitated visitor.

Surprise registered in his eyes as he found himself standing face to face with Brooke Davis, rather than her ex-boyfriend.

"Brooke. What are you doing here?" he asked and held the door wider so that she could walk inside.

"Why'd you lie?"

"Excuse me."

"The coffee. I saw you throw it away," Brooke informed as she dropped her purse on the nearest chair.

"I haven't the slightest idea what you're talking about," he denied while standing near the door. He crossed his arms over his chest and watched her follow the movement. "But if that was the best opener you could come up with to get in the door... you should have just said you wanted to see me again. I'd have been glad to invite you in."

"Oh please," Brooke mocked. Suddenly he was wide awake again while the annoyance in her voice had him biting back a smile. "You don't want me anymore than I want you. Flirting is just your way of getting under Peyton's skin," she declared as her eyes dared him to deny it.

Of course she shouldn't have been surprised when he did.

"It's my way of getting something," Julian agreed, grinning. "But I can tell you that our mutual friend is the last thing on my mind right now," he continued, all the while taking a few steps closer. It amused him that she held her ground, another silent dare. "I gotta admit that I like them feisty, so if you don't stop glaring at me like that you'll really turn me on."

Brooke smiled mockingly. "Tell me, producer boy... does this act of yours actually work on girls who aren't emotionally scarred?"

"If you find one, point her in my direction and we'll test it."

"You're a pig."

Julian shrugged, "I've been called worse."

"I don't doubt it," Brooke agreed as the sound of a ringing phone filled the room. "Late night booty call?" she asked, distastefully.

"Says the girl who showed up at my hotel room at midnight."

Rolling her eyes, Brooke asked, "Aren't you going to answer that?" when he made no move to retrieve the ringing object.

"Why would I want to talk to anyone else when I have such stellar company standing right here?" Julian asked back and smiled when she merely kinked her brow. "It stopped."

"It could've been Sam," Brooke declared, sounding suddenly panicked.

"It wasn't Sam," Julian assured.

"You don't know that."

"I do know that," he countered. "Unless Sam's on the west coast, acting as the assistant to a thirty something child who masquerades around like a brilliant film director," Julian said as he retrieved the phone and showed Brooke the number. "Personalized ringers. I knew exactly who was calling."

He watched her stare at the screen as she blinked back tears.

Suddenly she declared "This was a mistake," and began to head for the door. "Sorry I bothered you," Brooke muttered as she breezed past him.

"Don't."

He caught her arm in his hand, watching as her water filled eyes glanced up at him.

Julian wasn't sure what he meant to do, but when he found himself lowering his lips to hers, he was sure that kissing her hadn't been it.

_You can't break a broken heart. No damage you can do now._

For a few timeless moments, Brooke allowed herself to sink into the kiss. His lips were soft... tender, despite the grip he had on her arm. As his mouth moved against hers, she felt a tingle travel up her spine. Something that had been noticeably absent every time she and Owen had kissed. Something that she had been longing for during all their playful banter and nights spent at Tric. But something that she never felt, no matter how often she tried to convince herself that she did.

"Stop," she moaned into his mouth as his tongue chased after her words.

"You first," Julian said against her lips before delving deeper. His hands slid up to cup her face, holding her gently as his mouth plundered hers.

_We were in love._

Brooke heard her best friend's words and came screeching back to reality. Pulling away as though she'd been scalded, Brooke angrily lashed out. "The last thing I want, and trust me when I say that the very last thing I _need_, is to have some guy chase after me because Peyton Sawyer said no, first."

Before he could defend himself, she flung open the door and stepped out into the quiet hallway.

He realized then that it wouldn't have mattered what he said, she wouldn't have believed him anyway.

---

Brooke spent several minutes in her car outside the hotel, trying to get her thoughts in order.

Specifically why she'd let Julian kiss her. Especially since he wasn't her type.

_Liar,_ she silently declared.

Confident... gorgeous... apparently caring... he was exactly her type. Or at least he would have been if there wasn't the little detail of his past with Peyton. Something that made him one hundred percent off limits.

Not only would it make things awkward for everyone, but she hadn't been lying when she said she didn't want to get involved with a guy who had once loved her best friend. Who, if recent weeks meant anything, was _still_ in love with said best friend.

Or so Peyton believed when she vented about Julian and the hard time he was apparently giving Lucas.

Something about getting the job done the hard way.

"God, why do I even care?" Brooke asked herself before turning the key in the ignition. She began to shift into drive when she saw Julian hurry out of the building. He held a cell phone to his ear with one hand and used the other to shrug into a jacket. Brooke couldn't help but laugh as she watched him trip on his way to the silver rental he'd been sporting recently. Then she saw him drive off like the devil was chasing him.

She realized then that maybe Peyton wasn't the only girl that he was trying to spend time with. After all, her best friend had mentioned something about Julian having a lunch date with a mystery woman a few weeks before. Maybe he really _had_ gotten a late night booty call, she thought and grimaced at the remembrance that his lips had just been on hers.

---

With little sleep to show for the night, Brooke was cranky as she walked up to her storefront and found Lucas waiting. "Morning," he quietly greeted while Brooke turned her back to open the doors.

"Morning," she returned dutifully.

"Still no luck with Sam?"

"No," she shook her head. "So what's up?" Brooke asked, thinking that his latest problem with Peyton must be something major if he showed up before 8AM on a Sunday.

"Nothing, I just..." Lucas trailed off, watching Brooke drape her coat over the counter. _She looks tired,_ he couldn't help but think. "I know that we haven't really talked lately and I guess I just needed to know that you were doing okay," he said, as Brooke curbed the snarkiness that bubbled forth inside of her.

She knew they hadn't really talked lately,or if they had, it wasn't about her but about the shopping list of problems that Peyton and Lucas found to pick at. In all her life, Brooke had never met another couple who was only happy after someone else had to suffer for it.

But Peyton was her best friend and despite Lucas' recent absence in that department, she couldn't really blame them for phasing her out as they grew closer again. The one thing that _did_ bother her though was their relationship with Jamie. Peyton made no effort towards him and since getting back together, Lucas had rarely seen his nephew. Something that her godson had mentioned a few times in passing when Naley wasn't around.

"I'm fine."

His expression was sad as he looked down at her with blue eyes. "Don't do that, Brooke," he quietly said.

"Do what, Lucas?" she asked as her nerves began to get the better of her.

"Don't pretend with me," he said and leaned towards her. "I know how much Sam means to you and I know that just disappearing like this is killing you inside."

She had to look away as anger and sadness began to meld into one. "I know that you know it, Lucas because you were there for me with Angie," she acknowledged, feeling another tug in her heart as she thought of the precious baby she'd grown so attached to. "But where have you been since then, huh? Where was all this concern when I got attacked right here in this store? Where was all your concern when I basically curled into myself and distanced myself from everyone afterwards?"

"Brooke..."

"No, Lucas... you don't get to explain it away because everyone else made the effort. God, even Nathan came to see me because he knew I was hurting about something," Brooke declared while her emotions began to get the better of her. Then it was as if all the fight inside her just faded away. From one second the next she was just sad and empty. "I will forever be grateful for all your help with Angie. I loved that little girl and I know that you did too. But... that Lucas doesn't exist anymore. At least not for me, he doesn't."

Owen was one thing. Sure he'd hurt her but she also hadn't expected much else from him. At the end of the day he was just a bar manager that she flirted with because he wouldn't give her the time of day. She played with him and he played back. Nothing more or less. But Lucas... he was supposed to be the one person who saw her when no one else did. Or at least he should've been.

Now Peyton was the only one he saw and everyone else disappeared around them.

"I really think you should go."

"No. Brooke, I just... I'm sorry. I know I haven't been a good friend lately, but that's why I'm here now. I want to make things right for you."

Squaring off against him, Brooke held strong when she would've otherwise given in. Beautiful words didn't matter anymore. She wasn't sure that they ever did. "You don't even know Sam and frankly, it's not your job to make sure that I'm anything. So go home to Peyton. I'll deal with this just fine on my own."

_But I'll do it by myself, just like I always do._

The words may have been said to Owen but they still rang true.

"Brooke..."

"Just go home Lucas," she tiredly said. "Just go home."


	2. White Horse

**Author's Note: **_Let me just start off by saying how absolutely blown away I was by all your wonderful reviews. I guess there are a lot more budding Brooke/Julian fans out there than I thought. So I'd like to say thank you for all the kind words and encouragement. And while this is most definitely a Brulian fic, in order for me to tell this story, I feel like there are a lot of unsaid things that need to come out regarding B/L and P/Ju so I hope you understand when we have a few of those moments. Thanks again, and I hope this chapter doesn't disappoint!_

_And... please forgive me for the very long delay between chapters. Studying for finals pretty much occupied every free second I had when I wasn't working but I'll try to get the next one out quicker. Also... there will most definitely be a lot of B/Ju in the next chapter. Thanks!  
_

_**White Horse - Taylor Swift**_

**

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**

**Chapter Two – White Horse**

_I'm not your princess, this ain't a fairytale  
I'm__ gonna find someone someday who might actually treat me well  
This is a big world, that was a small town  
There in my rear view mirror disappearing now  
And it's too late for you and your white horse  
Now it's too late for you and your white horse to catch me now_

"…just go home."

Silence stretched between them as their eyes waged a war of wills. Brooke held her ground, tired but determined to see him walk out the door. And in his infinite confusion, he couldn't understand when things had changed between them. Why he was suddenly the villain of the piece.

"Brooke…" he opened his mouth to say as her cell phone began to ring.

Finally breaking the staring match, Brooke reached into her purse to retrieve the ringing object. The number was one she didn't know, but hoping that it was Sam, she eagerly answered it anyway. "Hello?"

"It's Julian," the voice greeted, sounding about as tired as Brooke felt. "Explaining everything would take a really long time, so I'm just gonna say that Sam's alright. She's with me now and we're on our way back to Tree Hill."

She stopped breathing. Brooke was sure that she had stopped breathing as she heard the words he quietly spoke. "How did you..." she managed to say, while Lucas came around the counter to place a comforting arm around her shoulders. To provide some reassurance when he saw her eyes fill and watched her skin turn white as a sheet. "How?"

But he didn't answer. Instead, Brooke heard him sigh before finally saying, "Thirty minutes. Then Sam can explain everything."

Nothing more or less. Then the silence told her that he'd hung up the phone, so she slowly lowered her hand and stared at the screen. "Brooke, what is it? What happened?" Lucas gently asked as he took the phone from her hands and set it down on the counter. "Is it Sam?"

"It was…" she trailed off before realizing that she could still feel Lucas' arm around her. So she cleared her throat and discretely stepped out of his embrace, ignoring the frown that turned down the corners of his lips. "That was Julian," she said, sounding much stronger as the information began to sink in. "Somehow he's with Sam." She forced calmness into her voice while inside, her heart continued to beat a frantic staccato. "She's safe."

Confusion once again lit Lucas' eyes as he stared back at Brooke. "How do they even know each other?"

Shaking her head, Brooke said, "She loves to write. Apparently she's interested in movies and... I guess she thought Julian could help."

It occurred to Brooke then, how inane the conversation was becoming.

Sam's connection to Julian didn't matter… at least not right now. The important thing was the relief of finding out that Sam was safe and on her way home. Even if Brooke still didn't know how to feel about the fact that Julian knew where to find her foster daughter and never said a word.

"If he's using her to get to you, I swear I'll…"

"You'll what?" Brooke demanded. The jealousy she heard in his voice quickly snapped her attention back to the present. "God, Lucas… I don't need you to be my hero. This isn't some twisted fairy tale. _I'm_ not some princess that needs saving," she snapped. "And I will _not_ give you another reason to hit Julian Baker just because you're still pissed that he fell in love with Peyton while you were busy falling in love with Lindsey."

Their eyes locked, fighting another unspoken fight.

But he gave in first and when he did, his expression told her that he wasn't just confused, he was hurt by the harshness in her words. "Fine. Forget I said anything," Lucas replied, holding his hands up in surrender as he backed away. "Do whatever you want."

Suddenly it was senior year again and he was declaring to a party full of classmates that he _wasn't_ the one for her.

"I always do," she murmured to the empty store as she watched him walk away.

---

"Most people wouldn't have done what you did," Sam quietly commented. "For either of us."

"Well I doubt Brooke will feel too grateful," Julian replied. "Now that she knows I left without telling her that you called," he added, thinking about the woman whose tears had elicited more of a reaction in him than anyone else had in over a year.

A woman who intrigued and frustrated him to the point that he had to fight to hold onto his common sense when she was around.

"When it comes to me, your 'mom' isn't particularly forgiving."

"Why? What'd you do to her?" Sam wondered. Oddly, it didn't occur to Julian to be offended by the accusation. "I mean... you know... aside from today."

He shrugged. "I dated her best friend... seems to be all the reason she needs," Julian answered as he remembered the way she stormed out of his hotel room after their kiss. The words she flung at him with more hurt than anger.

He wondered if she even realized how much she actually resented her "best friend."

Not that Julian really blamed her. Not after reading Lucas' book at least a hundred times.

"It's hard for her, you know," Sam said after a few contemplative moments. "There's the whole glamor and money thing but that's not all she's about. It's not easy for her to let her guard down," Sam continued, driven by some unexplainable desire to let Julian in on Brooke's world. To give her someone she could finally trust. "Everyone she opens up to just lets her down... including me," she quietly continued, wondering if things would ever be the same between them despite what Julian insisted.

"I told you how out of her mind with worry she was," Julian gently reminded. For his own unexplainable reasons, the girl brought out his protective side. Something that Brooke had recently begun to do as well. "She's been all over town looking for you."

"I don't know why," Sam muttered under her breath.

"She cares a lot about you," Julian said simply. "Even someone like me can see it."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

He shrugged once more and glanced at Sam's curious expression. The one that had thankfully replaced her self-deprecating on. "It means that I'm no expert when it comes to Brooke Davis... far from it, actually... but even standing at a distance, I can still see how much you matter to her. Attack and all."

"Oh."

Her pensiveness kept Sam silent until they reached the Tree Hill city limits sign.

"I like Peyton well enough. I mean, she got me backstage at the USO concert and introduced me to Mia, which was pretty cool," Sam quietly said, all the while watching the passing trees turn into buildings the closer they got to Main Street. "But I get the feeling that she's the reason why you and Brooke are so closed off. So I kind of figured that it'd make sense for the two of you to..."

"I'm not that guy, Sam," he interrupted. "I'm just here to shoot a movie."

"Right," she agreed, nodding her head. "That's why you drove to Charlotte in the middle of the night, lied to a cop about who you were and convinced me to come back to Tree Hill," Sam reminded. "To shoot a movie."

"Sam..."

"You already _are_ that guy, Julian. I think you're just too scared to admit it."

"Who needs a shrink when you've got Sam around?" he muttered.

"I'm just trying to help."

"Then do me a favor," Julian said. "The next time you think about running away in the middle of the night... don't."

---

"So I guess I'm grounded, huh?"

Brooke's gaze snapped up as the words and the ringing bell above the door reached her ears. She was devoid of makeup and the clothes on her thin frame were the same from two days before. But she was still Sam and Brooke wasted no time hurrying around the counter to pull the dirty teenager into her arms. "Thank god you're okay," she murmured against Sam's hair as she held her close.

"I'm so sorry," she cried and clutched at Brooke, allowing herself to feel safe for the first time since she walked out of the house. "I know that I screwed up and..."

"Shh..." Brooke quieted. "None of that matters anymore."

Pulling away, she looked Sam up and down, searching for any signs that she'd been hurt. "Where were you?" she asked once she was satisfied that there were no visible injuries. "How could you just run off like that?"

"I'm sorry," the young teenager sniffled. "I just... I couldn't stand that I'd hurt you."

Tears fell as Brooke pulled her close again.

"_You_ didn't do anything to me, Sam," she whispered. "I'm so sorry that I didn't say that before you left. I should have. I should stopped you."

"That's basically what Julian said you'd say." Sam felt Brooke stiffen and pulled back just as her guardian's expression began to harden at the mention of his name. "If you're gonna be mad at someone, Brooke... it should be me. Not Julian."

"Speaking of the coward... where is he? Was he too scared to come inside?" she asked as her temper began to flare.

"He had some work to do," Sam explained.

Brooke snorted. "That's convenient."

"It really wasn't his fault. He didn't have much of a choice."

"There's always a choice, Sam." Brooke crossed her arms over her chest and shook her head. "He knew how worried I was and he still left without saying anything. Not a phone call... not even a text to let me know that he'd heard from you. That you were safe."

Sam glanced down and stared at the ragged toe of her shoe. Brooke had been trying to convince her to give up the old skater shoes in favor of a new pair but she kept putting it off. Now they carried the mud from outside a ragged Charlotte house. From two days she wished she could forget.

"I guess now we've come to the part of the after school special where I tell you what happened," she quietly said.

Brooke steeled her resolve and nodded her head. "Yeah... I think we have."

---

Sitting together on the purple couch in the corner, the two girls faced each other as Sam began her tale. "After I left, I called Jack and met him under the bridge. His brother..." she trailed off, thinking of the scarred face and malicious brown eyes of the man who attacked Brooke. "He picked me up."

"The same brother who knocks Jack around sometimes? That brother?" Brooke questioned as frustration, anger and worry all began to meld into one.

"Yeah... that brother." Sam knew that if Brooke detested the guy now, she was really going to hate him once the entire story had been told. "We started driving around for a while," the young brunette continued. "Mostly just county roads and he was sort swerving around every few minutes, like he was falling asleep or something. So Jack asked if he could drive instead and..."

Frowning, Brooke prodded, "And what?"

Tears began to fill Sam's eyes once more, but this time she refused to let them fall. "And he said that Jack had done enough damage for one day. He wasn't going to let him make anymore mistakes."

The way it was said, Brooke was positive that he wasn't talking about something as simple as forgetting to take out the trash. "Okay, what mistakes did he think Jack made?" But when her question went unanswered, Brooke's frown stretched wider. She reached for Sam's hand, hoping to provide whatever strength the young girl needed in order to finish the story. "Sam?"

"He told me the truth," she finally managed. "His brother... he... he's the one that attacked you."

It was out and it couldn't go back in.

Sam thought that despite all the second and third chances Brooke had given her, there wouldn't be another after finding out the whole truth. After learning that she got in the car with the man who had bruised and broken her over a few stolen clothes and some angry words.

But when the shock on her face began to fade away, Sam didn't see anger... she saw sadness.

"Considering my very un-noteworthy past in academics, I don't throw this word around lightly... but are you stupid?"

Now it was Sam's turn to be shocked. "What?"

"I realize that common sense tends to take a leave of absence when emotions are running high, but... Sam, how could you get in a car with a guy like that? He could have hurt you or.. or...raped you and..." she trailed off as memories of her own past denial came flooding back. "Did he hurt you, Sam? Honestly. Because I swear to god, if he touched you, I'll..."

"Woah, terminator... I'm fine," Sam quickly assured. "I promise."

Brooke took a deep breath and nodded once. "Okay. Then keep talking."

Now it was Sam who breathed in deeply as she relayed more of the story. "He just kept driving... he said that he couldn't risk staying in Tree Hill until he knew that I wasn't going to tell the cops," she explained. "So he drove into Charlotte because he had some friends there. Three losers that all live together in this broken down house that smells like urine most of the time."

"Charming," Brooke muttered.

"Jack was so freaked," Sam continued, trying to get it all out as quickly as she could. "We were pretty much just stuck there until the second day when one of the guys came back with something."

"Back with what?"

"Drugs. I don't know what kind," Sam replied. "They all got pretty high and one of them started seeing things that weren't there. Spiders crawling on his arm or something underneath his skin... I'm not really sure. He just got really freaked out and attacked one of the other guys," she relayed. "They were pretty much just clawing at each other like two girls cat fighting and while they were busy with that... I ran out."

"What about Jack? Did he go with you?"

"No... he said he understood why I had to but that he had to stay and take care of his brother," Sam answered. "I guess its a regular occurence in their family, or something. His brother messes up, Jack cleans it up."

"Sounds pretty broken to me," Brooke quietly stated.

"Aren't we all?"

Said so simply, it took a moment before the fist closed around Brooke's heart. Sam's words were so cynical, so broken all on their own, that she wanted to shake her until she realized that it didn't have to be that way. That Sam's world would never be like that again as long as she let Brooke help hold it together.

"Sam..."

"So I went to the cops," she said before Brooke could offer up any sympathetic words. "I told them everything I knew. Jack, his brother, the attack... the drugs... everything."

"Which was how Julian got involved," Brooke deduced.

"How'd you know that?"

"Well I might not rank in as foster mom of the year, but I _did_ do a lot of research before our arrangement became a permanent one," the older brunette explained. "I know your rights, the things you can and can't do... I know that you were a minor reporting a crime and that they would most likely need your guardian around to come and get you."

Sam sighed and fought a losing battle with her tears. "They said they'd bring him in... I just didn't want to take the chance that you'd come pick me up and... and have to see him. I didn't want you to feel scared again. And Julian...he understood."

Her anger towards him began to fade away. While she didn't agree with the way he'd done things, she understood why he did them. Brooke was even a little bit grateful that he'd given Sam one more person she felt like she could trust.

"Sam," she said and cupped the girls cheeks as the tears began to fall. "Thank you."

"What?" the girl asked, surprised.

"We're gonna get through this, Sam. Me and you... it's all gonna be okay. I promise."

When she pulled her into her arms, she felt only the slightest hesitation before Sam clutched her close. "I'm so sorry," she mumbled through the tears.

"So am I," Brooke murmured. "So am I."


	3. Different

**A/N:**_ Okay.... another long pause between chapters. I'm so sorry! Between finishing school, work stuff and holidays plans, I've been completely slacking on this story, but not anymore. At least hopefully it won't be long. Right now I feel so torn between my long time love for BL and my new infatuation with BJu. Every time I watch something pertaining to either couple, I start leaning in that direction. I guess right now I'm hoping that if there is never a BL and that BJu is Brooke's future... that Mark handles it well instead of the way he handles every relationship on the show these days._

_Anyway... on topic, thanks for the reviews and sorry for the long delay!!  
_

_**Different - Acceptance**  
_

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* * *

  
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**Chapter 3 - Different**

_I'm taking a chance,  
this could be different.  
This could be all I'm waiting for.  
Taking a chance,  
this could be different.  
This could be all I'm waiting for_

"Two nights in a row," Julian began as he opened the door and found himself staring down into uncertain hazel eyes. "People might start talking."

Forgoing their usual banter, Brooke simply asked, "Can I come in?"

His answer and invitation into the quiet room was to open the door wider so Brooke could walk in. "I'm surprised you're not yelling yet," Julian admitted once the door had soundlessly closed behind her.

"Should I be?"

"_Shouldn't_ you be?" he asked back.

"Maybe," Brooke murmured and walked towards his window. There seemed to be a melancholy about her that he didn't understand. Something that seemed to encompass her as she pulled the curtains aside and stared out into the darkness. "Do you ever look outside at night and expect to see a city full of lights staring back at you?" she wondered, thinking about her time in New York. The crowds, the people… and even the anonymity that came with her first years spent in the city. Back when things were a little simpler, if not much lonelier. "And if you do... do you ever feel disappointed in that half second when you see nothing but your reflection staring back at you?"

"Who says I'm not used to the darkness?" he asked back, causing her to laugh humorlessly.

"You and I really are a lot alike... aren't we?"

"Maybe." But instead of nothingness, it was _his_ frown reflected to her in the window. A brief and sad image just before she turned and let the curtains slip from her hands. "What's on your mind, Brooke," he asked and dug his hands inside his pockets. It was an uncertain stance that she wasn't at all used to. Another side to him besides the cocky director he often portrayed and the sympathetic friend that had ridden to Sam's rescue the night before.

"I was attacked in my store."

Unlike with Peyton and even with Haley afterwards, there was no reaction from Julian. Just an expression that told her he already knew the whole story and silence to let her know that he was willing to listen if she wanted to talk about it.

_Funny,_ she thought, _a stranger was willing to do what her best friend couldn't._

_"_Trust has always been a hard thing for me," she quietly admitted after making the decision to try and explain her behavior since he first showed up in Tree Hill. "And what happened to me that night just sort of cemented all those issues. So when I warned you away from Peyton and Sam... I guess I came on a little too strong," Brooke decided. "And for that, I'm sorry."

But Julian didn't accept it. Instead he walked around the chair towards Brooke and hesitated when he saw fear light her eyes for the briefest second before it fell back into darkness. "There's two schools of thought when it comes to trust," he carefully began. "Some think that trust is given freely. That you trust people until they give you a reason not to."

Brooke stared up at him and replied, "Sounds optimistic."

"To some people it's perfectly realistic," Julian gently countered. "But then there's the other side of the spectrum. They're the people who believe that trust is earned. That it's hard to give and easy to take away."

"And which are you?" Brooke wondered, kinking her brow in question. "The optimist or the cynic?"

"The realist."

"Meaning?"

"Meaning... I know that trust is something that people either protect, or take advantage of. That some are careless with it because they never had to work for it," he said and couldn't help but reach out to tuck and errant strand of hair behind Brooke's ear. He watched her eyes follow his movements but unlike before, he saw no fear in them. Just and open curiosity that she either couldn't, or didn't want to disguise. "And there are others who never had it, who desperately need it to prove that they deserved it in the first place."

"You sound like a big, convoluted fortune cookie," Brooke declared, though not meanly.

"You picked Sam," he replied. "You gave her your trust and despite a few teenage problems like throwing a party in your store and hiding a boy in her room... she protected that trust. So you want to protect _her_," he shrugged. "I understand that. I also don't think you should ever apologize for it."

"She told you about that stuff?" Brooke asked, not bothering to hide her surprise.

Julian shrugged once more and said, "It was a long drive."

"Oh," Brooke murmured and glanced up into his dark stare. She couldn't read him and for some reason, that disappointed her. "I guess she trusts you."

"Question is… will _you_?"

---

"So how long before you can go out at night without trying to leave me with a babysitter?" Sam asked as Brooke stepped through Haley's front door.

"Depends," Brooke kinked her brow. "If I leave you alone in the house, are you gonna try to throw another party or hide some boy in your room?" she asked when Julian's words echoed in her mind.

"Never gonna live those down, huh?" Sam asked, but there was humor in her voice.

It was a good sound for Brooke to hear. It gave her hope that things wouldn't just go back to normal... they'd get even better. But before Brooke had the chance to voice it, Haley walked in carrying a steaming mug. "Thank god," she groaned. "If I had to listen to Sam and Nathan fight over who the Mario Cart champion was one more time, I was gonna throw both of them out the door."

"Actually, I believe her threat was more along the lines of throwing Jamie's_ Wii_ out the door," Sam corrected and smirked when her teacher simply rolled her eyes.

"Either way."

"Well as much as I hate to interrupt the beginning of what'll probably a riveting argument...," Brooke sarcastically interjected as she spied a slumbering Jamie on the living room couch. "We gotta get going."

"I guess that's my cue. I'll go get my stuff," Sam volunteered while Haley lingered behind with a concerned expression adorning her features.

"So how'd it go with Julian?" she asked once the teen was out of earshot. Straight to the point as always.

"Well..." Brooke trailed off as an image of the dark haired producer flashed in her mind. "I told him I'd do the costumes for the movie," she admitted, shrugging. "He said I'd have carte blanche and considering that my only client right now is Peyton, who isn't exactly paying me for the dress... I figured it was a pretty good offer."

"If you need money..." Haley began.

"It's not the money," Brooke quickly interrupted, knowing that her friend was about to make an offer. "I have more than an enough to last me until I get the new company off the ground." Thankfully she had listened carefully when her financial adviser spoke and because of it, she was able to work on the new line at her own pace. There wasn't a debilitating crunch to hurry things along like there had been when Clothes Over Bro's first got started. Or more specifically, when Victoria began to run it. "Trust me... finances aren't an issue."

The shorter brunette frowned, "Then what _is_ the problem?"

Brooke could only shrug. "It's hard to explain," she said and tried to put into words what had been bothering her for weeks now.

She knew that there was more to it than missing Angie, or being attacked in the store. That her problems stemmed from something else that she couldn't quite put her finger on.

"Since I decided to start the new company, I've designed a few things here and there but for the most part...," she trailed off uncertainly. "For the most part, lately I can't help but feel creatively stunted," Brooke finally admitted and crossed her arms over her chest protectively. "I'm glad that Sam and I are on the road to recovery and you know that I love being an extended part of the Naley family but... I just need something more and the problem with that is... I have no idea what _it_ is."

"It's okay, Brooke. I know exactly what you mean."

"You do?" she asked, sounding half hopeful, half relieved.

"Yeah, of course I do," Haley assured. "I love Jamie and Nathan with my entire heart. They're everything to me."

But if she hadn't voiced the words, Brooke still would have known it every time Haley looked at her son and husband.

"So I couldn't understand why I still wanted music if I had everything I needed between my family and teaching," she openly admitted, though Brooke couldn't help but frown at the thought.

"But music is just as much a part of you as teaching is. It's who you are."

"I know," Haley smiled. "Now. But I didn't understand it at first and what made things even worse was that I felt like I couldn't write anymore. I'd sit in front of the piano or hold my guitar in my hands and it was just... nothing. So I thought I was done. That _that_ part of my life was over and I was just hanging on to a memory of what could've been."

"But you weren't."

"No," she agreed, smiling once more. "I just needed to go back and find it all again. That place inside of me that makes music."

There was the relief again. The feeling that someone understood and that she wasn't selfish for wanting more.

"I see what you're saying," Brooke murmured. "And its why I said yes to Julian," she admitted, thinking about the words he said just before she agreed. "I've been really mixed up inside for a while now, but one thing I _do _know is that it all began senior year. The confidence to do it all came from a handful of designs that Mouth posted on the web." There was nostalgia in her voice as she looked back on it all. "And I guess I just hope that working on the costumes might take me back there, you know? That I might find a hint of the inspiration that I lost somewhere between then and now."

Haley's smile turned sympathetic as she rubbed a consoling hand over Brooke's shoulder. "Well considering his lack of honesty when he first came to town, I'm not exactly his biggest fan," she stated, all the while a quick and unwanted thought flitted across Brooke's mind. _He wasn't the one who lied... Peyton was._ "But if this is what you think is right for you," Haley continued, ignorant to the thoughts going on in Brooke's head. "Then I'm behind you a hundred and ten percent. You know that, right?"

"I know," Brooke smiled gratefully just as Sam paused in the doorway.

"Am I interrupting something?" she queried, carefully masking her expression.

Despite the progress they made, Brooke knew that they still had a long way to go before they smoothed out all the bumps in the road. "No," she shook her head. "I was just telling Haley that I've accepted Julian's offer to be the movie's costume designer."

Uncertainty turned to incredulity. "So he actually talked you into it?"

"You already knew?" Brooke asked, surprise lighting her features.

"Well yeah..." Sam hedged before finally rolling her eyes indifferently. "I mean... you know, he sort of mentioned it a couple days ago," she said, referring to the conversation they had in the diner over coffee and pie. "I wasn't sure if he'd actually go through with it though or that you'd actually say yes."

Brooke shrugged and pretended that she didn't see Haley's speculative glance when she replied, "I suppose you could say that he made me an offer I couldn't refuse."

"Whatever that means," Sam muttered and rolled her eyes once more.

Brooke ignored the look and instead pulled Haley into a friendly hug. "Thanks tutormom. I owe you one."

"Anytime, Tigger," she smiled.

"Old people are weird," Sam declared, to which both women uttered a defensive, "Hey!"

---

Later that night, after the lights had all gone out and Sam was snoring behind her bedroom door, Brooke wandered around the living room.

Despite her best efforts not to, she couldn't help but think about the conversation she'd had with Julian. The words he spoke as if he saw something in her life that she'd been standing blind to. But most of all... how much it scared her to admit he was right.

"_Question is... will _you?"

_"I trust you enough to be around Sam," Brooke replied simply. "Beyond that... whatever I feel towards you just doesn't matter." _

_Julian smiled, "Sure it does."_

_When her eyes met his, Brooke quickly looked away. "I should go."_

_"Do you always run away when things get uncomfortable?"_

_"Who says things are uncomfortable?" Brooke instantly responded. "And I'm not running away," she denied. _

_"You are," Julian declared as he took a few steps back. Guessing that she needed a little space, he retreated to the couch and made himself comfortable before continuing. "But I wouldn't feel bad about it if I were you. All your friends do it too," he shrugged. _

_"Reading a book about a few high school events does not make you an expert on all things Tree Hill," Brooke retorted hotly. "And it definitely doesn't make you an expert on me and my friends." _

_"Then what does it matter what I think?" he baited and just managed to hold in a grin as she turned her flashing hazel eyes on him. _

_He may not have known her for long, or even as well as he pretended, but Julian could see the annoyance she tried to hide. It shone through in the form of a crease along her brow and the stubborn set of her jaw.  
_

_"It doesn't," Brooke finally said, feigning nonchalance. _

_This time he did smile as he said, "Right."_

_"Forget it," she bit out. "I don't even know why I bothered," she said and began to walk off, Julian hot on her heels. He reached out and gently grabbed her arm, spinning her close in the process. "Two nights in a row... I might start thinking you like me or something," Brooke retorted as she looked between Julian's face and the arm holding hers._

_"You'd probably be right," Julian replied without missing a beat. _

_"Trust me, this is not..."_

_"What you need," he finished for her. "I know."_

_She kinked her brow in question but said nothing as he slowly released his hold. The surprising thing though, at least to Julian, was that she didn't try to walk away once she was free again. Instead she continued to stand before him, waiting for something unknown to him. _

_"I meant what I said about trusting you with Sam," she declared as a quick wave of gratitude washed over her. "Despite how adamant you've been about not being 'that guy' you still really came through for her. I'll never be able to repay you for that, but..." Brooke trailed off uncertainly. "But I still don't trust you with _me._" _

_Julian smiled, "Or is it that you don't trust _yourself_ when you're with me?"_

_"Maybe a little of both," she conceded. _

_Nodding, Julian couldn't resist allowing his hand to brush against hers for the briefest moment before taking a step back. "You know, I still really need a costume designer for the movie. And since you no longer think I'm out to corrupt your foster daughter... maybe you're a little more open to the idea of working with me on this." _

_There it was again. The nervous little feeling in the pit of her stomach that she didn't quite understand. Nor did she _want_ to understand it. "Julian, I don't think that's such a good idea."_

_"Afraid you can't control yourself?" he grinned, teasing in the hopes of making her feel more comfortable. He knew she kept her guard up when things got serious and hoped a little verbal sparring would loosen her up a little. _

_"You wish," Brooke rolled her eyes.  
_

_"Every night." _

_And there it was. A brief smile that she allowed him to see before she nodded once, conceding. "Fine. I'll do the costumes on one condition."_

_"You can have carte blanche if that's what you were wondering," Julian easily agreed. _

_"That was a given," Brooke replied without missing a beat. "I want your word that there's no ulterior motive. That it's just business. Nothing more." _

_Julian met her gaze steadily, searching to find what she genuinely wanted. "I can give you my word that I'm asking you because you're the best one for the job and not because I want to get in your pants," he stated before the corners of his lips turned up in a smile. "Though I can't promise that getting in your pants isn't something I also want. Sorry." Yet he sounded anything but. _

_"Wish what you want, just as long as you know it's never gonna come true." _

_"Never say never," he replied smoothly and leaned down to press a chaste kiss on her lips. All the while she asked herself, 'What have I gotten myself into?'  
_


End file.
